Pardon for my tardiness in updating this blog. Isyraf has not been well since Sunday and he just wants to be hold all the time. He is my priority so other things just have to wait. Alhamdulilah, he is better now and this allows me to do my daily routine while I am on maternity leave including updating this blog :).
Anyway, in our home, we make it a point we sit together for dinner. For the past 4 years this have become regular since work commitment is more manageable. Where I used to work, I hardly get to see my kids, usually by the time I am home the kids would have slept. Of course there will be occasions I miss dinner, however that occasions are very rare.
This is the opportunity for us to have good conversation with the kids. At their age, they need to have someone to listen to them and provide them with guidance on issues they are dealing with. This time is also a great opportunity to receive updates on what's going on at school, beyond academic of course.
Baby shared this one interesting scenario she faced last week.
It's a condition in Baby's school you can't hold 2 positions at one time. This is to give opportunity for others to also gain experience in assuming leadership positions. Baby came home so excited she got to be the asistant monitor for her class as the class monitor got appointed to be pembimbing rakan sebaya so the assistant monitor will be made monitor. The class then voted Baby to become the assistant monitor to which the class teacher agreed. And because of this new nomination, Baby got to go for leadership camp. She asked me for RM23 to pay for this. I happily obliged, I do want her to get exposed to many things while she is still in school.
However, the next day she came home disappointed. Her class teacher changed her mind and changed the rules. The class monitor can still be the class monitor despite holding another position in school. What disappoint her the most is now she can't go for the leadership camp. She then returned the money I gave her.
As a mother, of course it's my nature to protect her. I was silently upset on the treatment she received. Rejection is never easy at any age and she is only 14! I felt like going to school the next day and meet the teacher requesting for explanation. Not only she disappoint my daughter, she also gave her false hope which is wrong and a big sin in any mother's dictionary.
However, when I see how calm Baby is despite the disappointment shown in her eyes, I know she just need someone to talk to, to vent her anger and sadness. And I know, in life, she will face more disappointments and I can't protect her from all that. She just needs to deal with it.
I did ask her, to show that I support her, if she wants me to go and speak to her teacher. With a very relaxed tone, she just replied "It's ok Mama. The teacher just missed the opportunity to have the best Assistant Monitor she will ever meet. I don't think it's my loss. There will be other opportunities and those who choose to give me one will be glad they did".
Yes, though she is called Baby, she is more matured than some adults I know. I know she is sad, I know she also feel humiliated in front of her class for not being appointed when she was given hope she will be one. I am glad she finds it in her to accept, forgive and move on. And move on she did, move on to be a better individual.
I also learned one good lesson. I need to let go and trust my kids are able to take care of themselves. They know when they need my help. And they know I will be there for them when they need me.
Yes, parenting is tough. It doesn't come with a user manual. No matter how many parenting books you read, courses or talks you attend, it's not the same when you experience it.
And I am proud of Baby. She will definitely be a great role model to Isyraf. May Allah continues to guide her in doing the right thing....Amin....
Anyway, in our home, we make it a point we sit together for dinner. For the past 4 years this have become regular since work commitment is more manageable. Where I used to work, I hardly get to see my kids, usually by the time I am home the kids would have slept. Of course there will be occasions I miss dinner, however that occasions are very rare.
This is the opportunity for us to have good conversation with the kids. At their age, they need to have someone to listen to them and provide them with guidance on issues they are dealing with. This time is also a great opportunity to receive updates on what's going on at school, beyond academic of course.
Baby shared this one interesting scenario she faced last week.
It's a condition in Baby's school you can't hold 2 positions at one time. This is to give opportunity for others to also gain experience in assuming leadership positions. Baby came home so excited she got to be the asistant monitor for her class as the class monitor got appointed to be pembimbing rakan sebaya so the assistant monitor will be made monitor. The class then voted Baby to become the assistant monitor to which the class teacher agreed. And because of this new nomination, Baby got to go for leadership camp. She asked me for RM23 to pay for this. I happily obliged, I do want her to get exposed to many things while she is still in school.
However, the next day she came home disappointed. Her class teacher changed her mind and changed the rules. The class monitor can still be the class monitor despite holding another position in school. What disappoint her the most is now she can't go for the leadership camp. She then returned the money I gave her.
As a mother, of course it's my nature to protect her. I was silently upset on the treatment she received. Rejection is never easy at any age and she is only 14! I felt like going to school the next day and meet the teacher requesting for explanation. Not only she disappoint my daughter, she also gave her false hope which is wrong and a big sin in any mother's dictionary.
However, when I see how calm Baby is despite the disappointment shown in her eyes, I know she just need someone to talk to, to vent her anger and sadness. And I know, in life, she will face more disappointments and I can't protect her from all that. She just needs to deal with it.
I did ask her, to show that I support her, if she wants me to go and speak to her teacher. With a very relaxed tone, she just replied "It's ok Mama. The teacher just missed the opportunity to have the best Assistant Monitor she will ever meet. I don't think it's my loss. There will be other opportunities and those who choose to give me one will be glad they did".
Yes, though she is called Baby, she is more matured than some adults I know. I know she is sad, I know she also feel humiliated in front of her class for not being appointed when she was given hope she will be one. I am glad she finds it in her to accept, forgive and move on. And move on she did, move on to be a better individual.
I also learned one good lesson. I need to let go and trust my kids are able to take care of themselves. They know when they need my help. And they know I will be there for them when they need me.
Yes, parenting is tough. It doesn't come with a user manual. No matter how many parenting books you read, courses or talks you attend, it's not the same when you experience it.
And I am proud of Baby. She will definitely be a great role model to Isyraf. May Allah continues to guide her in doing the right thing....Amin....
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